Imposed suffering and elected suffering

We cannot avoid the shock of accident injury. We cannot escape the discomfort of sickness or loss. We cannot dodge the anguish of broken relationships. We cannot run away from the sadness of the death of loved one. We cannot evade the stabbing irritation of hurtful comments.

Since there is no escape from the various forms of suffering that humanity experience, what are we to do? We must learn to face the pain. Evading or running away will not solve anything. We need to confront and work on legitimate suffering.
For better understanding, it's important to note the difference between imposed suffering versus elected suffering.

Imposed suffering is comprised of life events over which we have no control. Natural disasters would be a classic example. We have no control over earthquakes and the damage the produce. All of these experiences are imposed or forced upon us from the outside. We cannot change them. We can only painfully accept them and move on. See also "facts of life and problems of life"

Meanwhile, elected suffering still creates agony, but it comes from a different source. It is not imposed because it comes from inside us. It is created out of our own thinking process or our own actions.

No one forces us to become alcoholics; yes we choose to drink. No one forces drug upon us; we choose to take drugs. No one forces us to overeat; we choose to put food in our mouths. No one forces us to divorce our spouses; we choose to divorce our spouses. We choose to look at pornography and we also choose to lie. We choose to cheat. We choose to steal. We choose to gossip. We choose to be negative and critical. We choose to be bitter and angry. We choose to hurt others. 

The responsibility for the pain and misery that comes from elected suffering is ours and ours alone. So, choose wisely.